4 random things--and 3 were fun!

We've have some good times these past couple weeks--and I'll just share four (because I happen to have pictures of them)
1. Camp out in the backyard--Claire is one brave little girl--she outlasted Lauren, Justin, and Aubrey. Only Claire stuck it out the whole night--with 2 little dogs.

2. A fun visit from Ben and Rachel (and Katelyn and little big Samuel) and my friend Brenda and her boys Tuffer (sp?) and Austin. Plus we got to spend most of the weekend with the Frandsens too.

First, we headed out to the BYU--TCU game. Or should I say TCU--BYU game? Pathetic. I don't want to talk about it.

We put the sad game behind us and made up for it the rest of the weekend--we shopped, went to the pumpkin patch, swam, went to the movies, played dominoes and just hung out. One day Brenda made us all a fabulous authentic Mexican meal--enchiladas, crispy chicken tacos, beans (the real kind), Spanish rice, homemade salsa and guacamole. So good. Thanks Brenda! I'm so glad you came.

It was a great visit--so good to see little Katelyn and Samuel, and Ben and Rachel. We have missed them. It helped me get over my homesickness.
3. This past weekend my friends Michelle (Midland) and Liesl (California) came to visit. Maybe they read my Debbie Downer post and decided to come cheer me up. It worked. I was cheered--and so grateful to have such amazing friends. We had so much fun--we shopped, ate at fun restaurants, shopped, got pedicures, shopped, went to the movies (by the way, save your money on "Nick and Nora"--two thumbs down--we only lasted 1/2 hour....but 1 & 3/4 thumbs up for "Flash of Genius") stayed up half the night talking and laughing, and then shopped. We hit the Grapevine Mills Mall, the Southlake Town center, Sam Moon, and the Allen Outlets. Recession recmession! We had to do our part.

I still can't find my camera so I swiped these pictures off Liesl's blog. It was a great break from life--we even stayed in a hotel so I didn't have to be a mom. We missed those who couldn't make it.

4. Dave and I spoke in church on Sunday. Not fun--but it was a good opportunity for us to introduce ourselves and share our testimonies. Our topic was "the challenge to become"--using our lives and trials to become what the Lord intended us to. It was a tough one to prepare--of course I talked a lot about losing Zachary and what he meant to our family.

I will share a small part of my talk here. (do I use quotation marks to quote myself?)

In speaking about adversity...

"This is something I have learned a little about this year with the loss of my sweet little boy. I have felt the “refiner’s fire” in my life like I didn’t know was possible. I have known suffering, sorrow, pain, and heartache and have understood the blessings of the Atonement with new eyes. I have a better understanding of the Savior’s plea in Gethsemane, “ O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me: nevertheless not as I will, but as thou wilt.”(Matthew 26:39)

I have learned many great and hard lessons through my many dark and lonely nights. I have learned how REAL this life is. I have learned how important, how necessary it is to turn to the Lord in our suffering. I have had some of the most spiritual experiences of my life in this way.

I don’t know that I have enough perspective on this particular trial in my life to know what the Lords wants me to learn and to become, but I know that I have been changed in many ways this past year. I hope they have been good changes. Sometimes my sorrow and grief can overwhelm me. It can hinder my ability to be a good mother, a good wife, or a good friend. It’s times like these when I find myself pleading with Heavenly Father for guidance and comfort—and in one way or another, it always comes. I am so grateful for the tender mercies of the Lord—which have come only as I’ve recognized them. "

The best part is...we are done. It was a good experience for both Dave and I--and a spiritual one, but we both feel as if a huge burden has been lifted.

So that's all for now--like really. That's all. Maybe laundry tomorrow?

First day of school--a little late

Remember a couple of months ago when everyone was posting pictures on their blogs of the first day of school? Well, guess what I just found??? Hey, I've got a lot of catching up to do.

We started school over a week late, since we were still in Midland packing up our house when school started. So the kids started their new schools in an empty house before we even had beds to sleep on. It was a hectic week (slash month.)

Lauren on her first day of Middle school. It was a little stressful for her--being the "new girl", but 6 weeks later she is doing great.

Claire on her first day of Kindergarten. Here in Keller they have 1/2 day kindergarten, which ends at 11:00 a.m. Not sure how I feel about it--the jury is still out on that.

Aubrey started 4th grade. She is having a tough time adjusting--and needs lots of hugs and encouragement from her family. She's working through a lot of emotions right now. Yesterday, I felt inspired to hold her on my lap and tell her about rainbows, and how they always seem to come after the storms. I think she needs to hear from me that everything will be okay.

Justin started 5th grade and goes to an intermediate school--for 5th and 6th graders, which is new to me. He is doing really well right now, after a rocky first few weeks, so I'm feeling much better.

Is anyone doing the math? That's 3 different schools--and with 1/2 day kindergarten, that's 7 different drop off/pick up times--7:45, 8:00, 8:30, 11:00, 2:45, 3:00, and 3:40 p.m. I have two words--car lines. I am trying to find ways to avoid them. I miss having the kids in one school--which was practically located in my backyard. Good 'ol Midland.....Ahh well.

The kids have chosen a fun spot to do their homework. They put a "boat" in our pool (which is just a 13-year-old kiddie pool) and they soak up the sun and work on their homework--or so they claim.

As a brief update--things are going well right now. I'm starting to feel "settled"--is that the word I'm supposed to use? Boxes are almost gone--thanks to my awesome sister-in-law Julie who has been holding my hand through this. We've had some nice visits from friends and family which have been wonderful. More to come on that later--if I can find my camera.

Thank you, again, for all the emails, phone calls, texts, etc. It has helped tremendously. If I haven't responded yet--I'm sorry. Life is a little hectic right now--that's a good word too. It describes my life perfectly.

A few good things

another "favorite" picture

First, I'm a broken record, but thank you so much for your emails, comments, phone calls, gifts(thanks Mike and Jess, Andrea, Tami, Joy), cards, etc. I guess my cry for help--if that's what it was--was heard. I've been a mess and your thoughts and prayers have been felt and appreciated.
Second, if anyone had the opportunity to watch/listen to General Conference this past weekend, I have two words--You're Welcome. I take full credit, you see. Obviously, the wonderful talks and topics were meant for my ears. I'm glad I could share my personal--tailor-made for me-- conference talks with the rest of the world.
These are some of the things I heard:
From President Monson--(I'm paraphrasing) We need to focus on not what is missing from our lives, but be grateful for our abundance--We need to adapt to the changes in our lives and find joy in the journey.
From Elder Anderson--"You don't know everything, but you know enough.... Faith is not only a feeling, it is a decision"
From Elder Uchtdorf--"The adversary uses despair to bind hearts and minds in suffocating darkness...Hope encourages and inspires us to trust in the Lord" and "No matter how bleak the chapter of our lives may look today, because of the life and sacrifice of Jesus Christ we may hope and be assured that the ending of the book of our lives will exceed our grandest expecatations.... Hope sustains us through despair."
From Elder Wirthlin--"The Lord compensates the faithful for every loss...That which is taken away from those who love the Lord will be added unto them in His own way....Every tear today will eventually be returned a hundredfold with tears of rejoicing and gratitude.
From Elder Holland--In times of special need, God sends angels, seen and unseen...God never leaves us alone, never leaves us unaided in the challenges that we face...
Elder Cook--"the contrast of sweet and bitter is essential until the end of life....The atonement of Christ covers all of the trials and hardships that we encounter in this life."



To their testimonies I feel a need to add my own--something I don't do often enough. I don't mean to preach--but I figure I've shared part of the bitter, and so I need to balence it a bit. Though at times, my sorrow and grief threatens to destroy me, I have never felt alone. I have a loving Father in Heaven who hears and answers my prayers--who has brought me comfort during my darkest nights. My sorrow and sadness has never been without hope, never turned into despair. I have never questioned my faith, nor have I felt anger towards God or anyone. Although I don't understand all the "reasons" for this trial in my life, I am content that there is One who does. I am grateful to have a Savior who overcame sin and death for me. I am grateful for the knowledge that I will see my son again, and I can have the opportunity to hold him again--and to raise him...and run my fingers through his hair and kiss his chubby cheeks and to teach him about all the things that I have learned. I am grateful that I can have my entire family together--forever--that I will one day feel this loss no more.

I have had many special experiences these past months. Many too special to share. They have sustained me through the hardest days.
I count this past General Conference as the most memorable of my life. I am grateful for the strength it gave me.
This is sounding like a talk or something--and I don't mean for it to--but I have one more quote to share that I've recently read from Jeffrey R. Holland
"It is imperative to remember He is right there with us as He has ALWAYS been. When we weep, He and the angels of heaven weep with us..when suffering, we may in fact be nearer to God than we have been in our entire lives. Bad days come to an end. Faith always triumphs. Heavenly promises are always kept." Jeffrey R. Holland

It's perfect isn't it? Do you think it will help me tomorrow?

Thanks for listening--