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A Birthday Request for Zachary

Zach on his first birthday: December 13, 2007

In one month from today—December 13—our family will be commemorating Zach’s birthday. He would have been two years old. I think it will be a difficult day for our family. I’ve been thinking a lot about what I want to do to remember him on his birthday—and to recognize what he means to our family.
If he were still with us, I would be shopping for gifts and planning a party. I still want to give him a gift—and have some sort of celebration of his life.
It has helped me a great deal to think about some of the positive things that have come out of Zach’s death. There have been many. I think the best gift I can give my son on his birthday is to change my life for the better. I can give him a spiritual gift. (Thanks to my sweet friend Andrea for this idea).
On Zach’s birthday, our family will be visiting his grave in Midland and releasing white balloons with our spiritual gifts attached. As Claire says, we will be “sending our balloons to Zachary”. I will encourage my children to think of something they can improve on in their lives that will help them to be better, and will help them live worthy of having a forever family. I can think of no better gift.
I would like to invite anyone who wants to join us—either in Midland at the cemetery (Serenity Memorial on Rankin Hwy), or at your home wherever you are—even if you never knew Zach. Here I am, asking for gifts. Think of a spiritual gift for Zachary—a positive change in your life. If you would like, you can attach it to a balloon and “send it to Zachary”, but you don’t have to. It would truly mean the world to us.
The day after Zachary died, we had the kids release some white balloons with attached messages to Zach that they had written. With Justin’s permission, I share the message he wrote and sent with his balloon (but not before I made a copy).

“Dear Zachary,
I am having the most horrible time of my life. You can’t even imagine how much I love and miss you. You were my only brother, you were my only friend and pal. You don’t know how much I need you. I need you more than anything. I know that you are in a better place now, and that this was Heavenly Father’s plan for you. Please if you get this letter, please show that you are happy, show me a sign that you are with Heavenly Father and Jesus.
Love,
Justin
P.S. I love you.”

I believe these spiritual gifts to Zachary will make him happy. We can give him a sign of our love. Thank you for everything you have already done for us. We have been overwhelmed with your love and support.
Love,
Gillian

Claire's Week of Birthday Celebrations

6 years old!!!

Since Claire's birthday is on Halloween, we carried out our "birthday" tradition of going door-to-door asking for treats and small gifts. Does anyone else have that family birthday tradition?

Actually, the only birthday acknowledgement she got this year was a semi-special breakfast and taking donuts to her class---because the kids need more treats on Halloween. Luckily, she has grandparents to call her on her special day.


Before you start feeling too bad for her--our guilt always catches up to us and we tend to overcompensate. On November 1st we had the Frandsens over for a little family celebration. I (um, I mean Julie) made her the requested lemon cake--and we had dinner, gifts, and fun.

Side note--if you ever want to feel good about yourself....just give Claire a present....she is usually completely thrilled and showers you with hugs and excitement.

My mom made her this adorable Halloween quilt for her birthday--with cute little cross-stitched designs--and told her she could do whatever she wanted with it---outside forts included. She loves it--and I covet it.

Guess who this is from??? hint: not Sarah Palin

The following Saturday night (last week) she had a fun pajama party at a place called Jump for Fun with her friends from school and church. We jumped, and it was fun.

Claire and Dave

Aubrey and Emma

Lucky Claire even had her uncle Mike come to her party--all the way from Pennsylvania. It was fun to hang out with him this past weekend.

Claire has been literally begging for me to make her this Barbie cake all year--so I caved, because I have a hard time saying no to this little girl.

There was no rhyme or reason to this party--pajamas, jump houses, princess cake, an additional Barbie cake, Halloween goodie bags---what is happening to me???

The end, until next year---and now I can feel the guilt of Justin's and Lauren's pathetic birthdays. It's all about timing, people!

Last week at the Pumpkin Patch

Last Year at the Pumpkin Patch

Evolution of Pumpkin Patch Pictures

I think the Fall is my favorite time of year. I love the colors, the cooler temperatures, the spicy scents, the traditions. It's caramel apples, trick-or-treating, piles of colorful leaves, and baking pies. One of my favorite traditions is taking my kids to the pumpkin patch. I look forward to it for weeks--and I hunt for the perfect coordinating outfits for pictures. Pumpkin patch pictures are just my thing, okay. Even when "the patch" is just a few rows of pumpkins and hay bales in a church parking lot. But not this year--this year we discovered a real honest-to-goodness Pumpkin Patch. Hay rides and hay bale mazes included. We are in the big league now.

So I'd thought I would take a little stroll down pumpkin patch memory lane.

I even made a couple slideshows--from this year and last.

The pictures we took at the pumpkin patch in Midland last year were some of best pictures of Zachary we have. Zach was absolutely adorable in his little striped sweater and hat. The family picture is basically the only one we have of our entire family (except for a failed attempt last Christmas). It was a good day.

2003--the first year we had a digital camera.

The little Halloween jumper that Claire is wearing was a hand-me-down from Lauren. My mom made it for her when she was a baby.

2004---I got a lot of mileage out of these sweaters.

2005--I love this picture, it's when I first started to realize how similar my kids look.

2006--Zach was with us here--just two months until his birth.

2007--our whole family--all seven of us

2008--our "new" family. This was a hard picture to take. I'm glad I did it.

It's Halloween yo!

Halloween blog pictures--what else?

Lauren decided she needed to be a queen this year. I told her she was on her own this year for a costume--she IS 13 after all. But then we saw this costume and she loved it and I caved. She was way too cool to trick-or-treat with us though--and stayed at home to hand out candy to "both" trick-or-treaters who actually came down far enough. They were greatly rewarded.







Justin told me he would only dress up if he could wear a mask. Especially after the "Link from Zelda" fiasco from last year (where he was too embarrassed to get out of the car all night).


So this year he got to be a scary anonymous gorilla--who was also too cool to trick-or-treat. He doesn't like candy--so my efforts to entice him to beg for them door to door were in vain.

Justin being forced to smile--
so I could document this costume that I agonized over--
just so he could "hide out" all night. 2007




Aubrey was a super cute gal from the '50's. I was a hero for about 15 minutes when I showed her the saddle shoes I ordered off the Internet. But after she walked around in them and realized that they were way too small--and she was miserable all night--I became the villain again.

The day was all about Claire, of course. She was the birthday girl and let everyone know it (birthday pictures to come). She decided--at the last minute--to change her costume and wanted to be Cinderella. (We have a nice supply of princess costumes on hand --thanks to the grandma's--for just such an emergency.

Claire at the awesome ward party

wearing costume #1.

After trick-or-treating in the hood with some friends--we went over to their house for chili and brains. Yum!




Of course, it was tough this night not to think about our Zach--and how cute he would be this year on Halloween. Our thoughts took us back to last year--we miss our little monkey.

Halloween 2007--Zachary was not loving this costume--but he was pretty irresistible.